Episode 51

Reflections from the life and times of Mr. Smith. After I returned home from Africa, I spent the night in my tree house. Fortunately I did not get motion sickness from being up too high. I’ve been in other tree houses but there’s something different about my tree house; it doesn’t make me sick. The next morning I decided to go for a walk. On top of my fence. I walked completely around my yard…before I fell into my neighbor’s pool. This is not the empty pool, this is the one on the other side, Mr. McKnight’s pool. I floated on my back for a while - fat floats you know - before Mr. McKnight came out and saw me. Let’s just say he’s not a happy man. As soon as I saw him I turned over and pretended to be floating dead. The water muffled his cursing. He fished me out with his net. He expressed some glee at seeing it was me. I pretended to be dead for a little while, right up until he phoned all his friends and put me in a coffin. I sat up and looked around, but his back was turned, so I decided to play along a little bit longer. I’ve always wanted to attend my own funeral. The last funeral I’ve been to was my mother’s – God rest her soul. When the guests started to arrive, I was pleased not to see a dry eye. But I think they were laughing, not crying. This time when I sat up, I stood up. Then I promptly fell out of my coffin. The room was silent. And then I heard a voice from the tomb, “I might still be able to get my money back for the beer.” Mr. McKnight worries too much about finances. The crowds left. And I went home. Alone. And I had a party! A living party. I borrowed my neighbor’s pool. It was little Timmy’s from across the street, one of those one foot deep, round blow up pools.
Thus ends this week’s reflections. And then my mirror image disappeared.

Episode 47

Reflections from the life and times of Mr. Smith. I do my own designing. I designed my house, I design my clothes, I even designed my own boat once. Just the other day I decided to design my own tree house. Whenever you start designing a tree house, you have to start with the basics. The most important of these is the tree. So I read up on the internet on the strongest types of trees and decided that pine was the way to go. So I went to the store and bought some pine and planted it in my backyard.

That’s when I discovered, trees take a long time to grow. So I decided to go with a tree that was already grown. Unfortunately, my backyard has no trees. But my neighbor’s does. It sits right next to my fence. Sometimes the leaves fall into my backyard, which makes me rather angry, because it’s never enough to make a good leaf pile, just enough to tease you. So, that night, I snuck outside and moved my fence to the other side of the tree, thus extending my yard.So, with the most important piece in place, I commenced to designing my tree house. This is my tree house:

Unfortunately, I made a few minor math errors, and it ended up looking like this:

Oh well. If people complain, I can always move my fence back and say it’s on my neighbor’s property.
Thus ends this week's reflections. And then my mirror image disappeared.

[images copyright Mr. Smith 2009]

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