Episode 75

Reflections from the life and times of Mr. Smith. I witnessed a crime today. A little girl stole an ice cream cone from a little boy. I was shocked. And you guess it…appalled. I walked over. I slapped the little girl in the face. I was very ashamed when her mother came over and started yelling at me, explaining how the little boy had diabetes and couldn’t eat sugar. The little girl had saved his life. I was ashamed. Very, very ashamed. I was not a good man. According to the lady, I was a very bad, bad man. I think she was exaggerating a little bit. The president thinks I’m a very good man…called me in on another case. There was a murder. Two people were dead. So technically, there were two murders. I believe they call that….a double homicide. And I would know. Because I am a homicide detective. Or didn’t you know? Basically that means I’m a detective with homicidal tendencies…or that’s what psychiatrist tells me. The murder scene was thus. There were two dead people…one of them here, one of them there. There were two guns…one of them here, one of them there. There were two chalk outlines…one of them here, one of them…you guessed it….there. The pieces were all there. They were adding up. They were screaming, murder. Actually, those were the witnesses. The police there were saying it was a murder/suicide. The man shot the woman and then shot himself. Ah, but I knew what really had gone on…there was a third person in the equation. But that could not have been so, for the man was wearing a tie. No man would ever commit suicide while wearing a tie. Trust me. So I told the policemen there was another person…a real guilty person. I poked around a bit, found cigarette butts. Indeed, the two victims did not smell like smoke. My theory was proving true. I unrolled one of the cigarette butts and found a business card. He had rolled his own cigarettes. The cops went and picked him up. We had our murderer. I don’t think the president expected me to solve the case, but I did. I am, after all…Mr. Smith.
Thus ends this week’s reflection. And then my mirror image disappeared.